Next Chemo

My next chemo is this Friday. The first week after my first chemo was tiring, bowling was hard, I was tired. I got a wig, my insurance will cover it, but I haven't worn it yet because I was hoping, hoping that my hair really wouldn't fall out.

my white pillow
fairy dusted
white and gray
hair

but it is, darn it. I feel pretty good, not weak but not as energetic as usual. Work is fine, spring break is wonderful!

spring wind
spring time
spring rain
but best of all
spring
break

the kids are in cali and we're having a double break ... no kids ... no school ... no nausea ... no bad stuff ... just romantic two of us stuff for three whole days

I wander
tv for a while
then facebook
a computer game
a book
a nap
and then
surprise
strawberry shortcake
yum

Cheeemmmmooooo

three hours
two reading
one napping

Benadryl
nausea supressant
prednisone
tamoxifen
cytoxin

lunch
nap

wow
I'm still breathing

I've decided

no chemo
damn it

no hair loss
no wig

no nausea
no meds

no mouth sores
no miracle rinse

no dry skin
no lotion lotion lotion

no fatigue
no sleeping sleeping sleeping

no
no
no
okay
I feel better now
for
chemo
sigh

stalled

not moving
engine idling
not engaged
transmission rumbling
no connection
I'm
stalled

Future

looks dim
looks bright
is good
is bad
finds happiness
finds sadness
seems positive
seems negative
but
the future is
always
a breath away
so
breathe today
into tomorrow

the past is
prehistoric
the future is
fiction
I can only live
today