anticipation
the curse of
the season
anticipating
joy
peace
love

anticipation
the perfect gift
alread sold
the perfect meal
argumentified
the carols of joy
moodily mumbled
anticipation
lost in reality

when
an unexpected hug
a smile of thanks
exclamations of surprise
thanks
joy
peace
love
surprise

is what
Christmas really
is

Trim the Blog

lights glint
off ever imaginable
surface
mundane
now illuminated
by the softly
riccocheting
steaming shades
of blues reds yellows greens
they sink into my soul
and color my life
with Christmas

Blog Time

I want to play

My half finished paper
lies on my desk
but
I want to play

My half cleaned bedroom
a confusion of
neat clothes
and jumbled papers
lie on the bed
but
I want to play

I run past the kitchen
grabbing a soda
on the way
ignoring the chaos
of dishes unfinished
but
I want to play
now
first

Homework Blues

I read the paper
five times
each time
I read the paper
one line farther
than the time before

I read the paper
six times
each time
I read the paper
one paragraph farther
than the time before

I read the paper
ten times
each time
I read the paper
one page farther
than the time before

but I don't remember
reading it
at all

Blogging Laptop

A brand new
Toshiba
laptop
shiny
new backpack
new mouse
new new new

safe in the car
locked in the car
secure for the night
ready for class tomorrow
new new new

in the morning
rush rush rush
get coffee
go see the new apartment
go to work
rush rush rush

look in the backseat
the backpack
new new new
the laptop
new new new
my homework
done done done
all
gone gone gone

Blogging Bowling Blues

throw the ball
just throw the ball
don't think about it

just
keep your hand behind the ball
loosen your shoulders
eyes on the mark
walk straight
elbow straight
and
just
throw the ball

Blog Days Until Christmas

14 days to Christmas
2 weekends separate
2 Mondays
2 Tuesdays
6 days of work
1 day of school
3 papers due
5 nights of bowling
2 Thursday nights with the girls
2 Friday mornings with cereal and hot chocolate
3 laundry days

I live my life in groups
of numbers
how many of this
how much of that
but it's still
2 weeks until
you know

Silent Night

It's not silent night, not yet
but in Omaha silent night
came Thursday
and Christmas will never
ever
be Christmas
again

Blog Oughts

"Codes of ethics freeze the oughts in time and space." P.M. Cunningham. p281. "The Profession and Practice of Adulte Education.

I hate to take up space with citations, but I really like this quote and in case you want to find it, well, here it is. I'm taking Adult Education classes at UNLV and found this as I was drowsing over the last chapter in this book. It's not that it's not interesting, it's just been a long semester and, well, this is the end of it.

But, I really like the line, "freeze the oughts in time and space." Because lots of things seem to do that. The 'oughts' become stagnated, frozen in time, unchanging, when they should be fluid, mutatable, enriching, So the 'oughts' that should mutate depending on the situation and the people involved to paint a gloss of humanity and compassion, to soften the lines of 'should' that can become 'could' into hardened and unpenetrable, unchangable and heartless forces that bend one to another's will instead of lovingly and compassionately moulding two 'oughts' into one 'is'.

Blogging to the end of the semester

A beacon
of light
it urges me
it pushes me
it cajoles me
to reach
the end

without stopping
to clean the kitchen
put my clothes away
visit my mom
sweep the floors

but move
directly
unconsciously
purposefully
to my computer
to finish my last
assignment

Blog Las Vegas Style

I have a new blog, livenlasvegas.blogspot.com. I wanted to find a way
to express how it is actually living in Las Vegas. The capture the essence
of living in 'Sin City' USA. It's about the same as any big city though.
It's not CSI or any other show, it's about people going about their
daily lives, raising families, going to work, struggling, laughing, crying
but in the context of an unusual city, the City that Nevada Sleeps.

Within the framework of all of the hype there is an element of truth,
and so that's what I'm going to try to do.

Check it out.

Bloglightenment

Somone today asked me where my
pictures are ... I don't have pictures on
my blog. My blog is a writers blog. If
you want pictures you'll have to read
and then imagine them .... or ....

go to another blog (smile).

EduBlog

Mixed feelings
the paper is
reviewed
dissected
agonized
submitted
done

but not
gone

Blog-scripts

Christmas tree cup
half filled
coffee
cold

Blue chair
rollers slip sliding
me away

music
background of my life
twists through
thoughts

windows
computer
bedroom
car
spin by

waiting for
epiphany

Novel-Blogging

It sits there
balefully
staring at me
and then
surprisingly
unsurprisingly
begins
rather imperiously
I think

"I'm here
I'm waiting here
I'm still waiting here
I'm still quietly waiting here
not"

sounds like something
I'd write
crosses my mind

"I'm here
I'm waiting here
I'm still waiting here
I'm still quietly waiting here
not"

I stare

"write me
you started me
you outlined
you pulled strings
out of your mind

write me
you gave me life
scenery
you peopled me
hearts minds souls
you imaginated me
mystery adventure romance
finish me"

okay
'pause'
tomorrow

"sigh"

Blogosphere

Time
used to increment
microsecond
second
by second

now speed of lights
seconds and minutes
too short to measure
wake at 8
coffee at 9
write at 11
dripping past fingers
pooling at my feet
drowning me into
another sleep

stop!

Blogsters

I raised my children
they have children
and some of their children
have children

I worked outside the home
inside the home
around the home
and sometimes
under the home

I bought hundred dollar
tennies
and forty dollar acrylic nails
I used my car as collateral
for root canals
collected pennies
for Disneyland
and did San Francisco
for less
much less than
forty dollars a day

I baked cupcakes at
midnight
looked for index cards
after dark
sewed costumes
with less time than talent
and no talent

and today I
scrounged pennis for Taco Bell
searched for the witch's hat
found pink index card's
for school Monday
turned down my music
cleaned the kitchen
fixed the trampoline
and bought fluffernutter innards
because a family
isn't a when
it's a
who

Blogging Games

I love video games
I ponged to disaster
shot centipedes and
alien invaders
I ate dots
bananas and strawberries
I warred in the stars
and pinballed free games

Under the stress of
miniature audiences
who chanted
'get dead ... get dead'
I played and lost
instantanteously

Outnumbered
outmaneuverered
outmanned
outskilled
I became an
underground video junkie

I studied, practiced, yearned
while my facile
youthful
adept young
with finely tuned reflexes
carelessly gleefully
flaunted their victories

Beaten without surrender
I retreated to easier prey
chess
checkers
hearts
clue
internet monopoly
avoiding falling blocks
street fighters
and racing cars

until
finally
hiding from my young's young
I hide
entombed in
bacalaureate robes
surrounded by tomes
of the ages
in my study
and collapse

Blog Avoidance Syndrome

I used to blog
'most every day
I yearned to see
my name in lights
but now I blog
anonymously
'cause the zero
comments
has lowered my
heights

I have an assignment to do ... today
it's due on Wednesday, I must do it ... today
I've got the outline done ... yesterday
and said I'd finish it ... tomorrow
but tomorrow is now ... today
and when I wake again it will have been ... yesterday
and I will be late again ... then

I didn't write poetry for the longest time, and now it seems whenever I write anything it ends up in some weird poetic form ... give it up.

I'm taking my mom bowling with me next weekend, to a tournament
I remember when I would not have been caught dead going anywhere with my mom
but now I've generationed (new word) up through daughter..wife..mom..grandmom..g-grandma
and the fact that I can still go out with my mom
fills me with
awe

I have an assignment that is almost done
My kitchen is almost clean
My laundry is almost done
The front yard is almost ready for winter
My cars are almost cleaned out from my trip
My bed is almost made
My life is almost halfway done
My existence is
almost

Next year we will elect
another president
like four years ago
four years ago
four years ago
four years ago
we will elect
another
same
president

Feeling Bloggy

Whose faces
will I miss

Harry
smile
gentle
humorous
difted to sleep

Lawrence
smiling
wry humor
straight faced
depressed
hopeless
took himself away

Shirley
strong
fierce
independent
slipped across the river

Winston
tall
quiet
stoic
kidnapped by
cancer

Carolyn
funny
cheerful
caring
wistful
here
gone

how can something
so natural
leave such a large
empty
space

Blog of the Blog

Thanksgiving
turkey
tasty
trippin'
tatamount
to
tipsy
tyranasaurus
rex

Blog of the Day Before Thanksgiving

BotD November 21, 2007

the day before thanksgiving
the day before we know
what we will be thankful for

the day before
not the day of
to experience
not the day after
to remember
but the day before
in blissful ignorance

anticipation of
but no knowledge of
what is to come

the day before 9-11
the day before I lost my sight
the day before my daughter was born
the day before my dad died
the day before Katrina
the day before Nagasaki

hope -- faith -- joy
but the greatest of these is
love

the day before

Whatever of the Day

In the large scheme of thingss
my life is unimportant
irrelevant
insignificant
a small dot
in the larger dot
that makes up my neighborhood
city
county
state
country
world
in the universe

but it doesn't feel
that way
ever

Whatever / Whenever

I visited my home two weeks ago.
Not my home of now, but my home of then. It was amazingly unchanged, kind of.
The sidewalk is the same, the house is gone.
The corner is the same, the tree is gone.
Marie's house is the same, Marie is gone.
The fall smelled crisp, the old field had neatly mown grass.
The rain trickled down the window, neatly whisked away by automatic windshield wipers.

I had the strange sense of being in two places at once, wrapped in a mental time machine that never moved; it just tweaked my senses.

Blog of the Day

I'm thinking of renaming this: Blog of the Whatever.

Whatever. What a wonderful word. It is unsubstantial, ephermeral, uncommitted, random, unrealized. It is an answer to the great 'What' questions of life. The simple ones: "What do you want for dinner?" The complex ones: "What is it that you want?"

I'll try it out. I'll taste it on my tongue
I'll take a sip at bedtime
I'll gulp it down in the morning
If it works; great.
If not; well,
Whatever.

Blog of the Day

February 22, 2007

Today I haven't blogged in a while, but today I am compelled to blog. Why? I don't know.

I am afraid

You are 12
I am fifty
You are 5’
I am five foot seven
You are 100 pounds
I am one hundred sixty pounds
You are a little girl
I am a grown woman
You have experienced nothing
I have lived a thousand years
Yet
I tremble as you stand before me
My stomach rounds on me
My heart pounds
I am afraid of what you will do
To you.